I came here with a friend today

To Pocatello to watch a football game

But all i could think of was how i could only think of you

As I realize that I only love you

I came here with a friend today

With a friend that told me he wished he'd talked to me sooner

Before i met you

 

It's too late for me to turn around

Since he drove the car and i'm stuck in this town

You and me, we planned a date

But you had plans and I fell for the bait

Of traveling to a different place

And maybe allow a little opening to fate

But i don't want fate, i want to choose

Cause if agency is power then im an agent to you

 

Is it fair that I feel this way

When we still make jokes about our possible graves

With the words written in stone

Here lies what could have been but never was

Ive fallen in love with one I don't know

Whose memories are seeds i'm trying to water

 

When i doubt myself and am looking for ways to doubt you

Cause the boys in the past proved doubting is safe

When the first one said he couldn't love me

If i kept having all my anxiety

And the next one, I gave a second chance

Only to wake up with him in my bed

Confused as to why his hands weren't by my head

Learned that antartica was my new home

 

Took that lesson all the way next

To the man who promised his trust was earned

Who promised he loved me and wanted a ring

On his own finger, on december fifteenth

Only to beg and only to plead

That I could show him i loved him if I got on my knees

Put his favorite pen in my empty soul

And told me goodbye when I finally filled his bed

 

And now I'm in love with another someone

one who kissed my forehead when my dream turned to fright

Who said they don't need anything for their birthday

Cause life is a gift and so was I

I rolled my eyes and thought

"How can someone so full of light

be covered in shadows as he stands by my side?

Is my own darkness covering you?

 

Cause you're still a mystey

And yet.... I still love you...?"